"I saw Shawn out driving around, so I cranked it right, cut off a
few people and made it to Wendy's" - Pap

"This is what I was able to do with Seth's package ... let me rephrase
that ..." - Pap explaining to Shawn

"... it'd be cool, something like suicide for people who can't afford
it." - Seth

"Hey Pap, you wanna test my patch?" - Seth

"Everyone wants to test Seth's patch." - Shawn trying to help

"Okay, I'll look over your plots ... ah so you're going with a comedy
then." - Seth on the phone

"I'm using those to mail to the foreigners." - Shawn

"That cat and the cat at home have a thing for my bag ... whenever I 
set it down they always come up and hit it or sleep in it." - Shawn

"I can feel myself, this is weird, I'm 3d!!" - Seth imitating a thx mp3

"So how is womb.com?" - Pap

"Fine.. I was downloading something but I had to.. abort it..." - Seth, which
causes much groaning from Pap and Shawn.

"You're really going to like your present." - Shawn to Seth

"What is it though?" - Seth

"Yeah, I don't even know what it is." - Pap

"I know it's not a hammock or a blow-up doll, I already asked." - Seth

"Hey!  That's not what I saw before, that looks more like herpes.." - Seth
to Pap after seeing a texture map he requested.

"We're thinking about Seth-Online" - Seth

"I think I got too much mayo" - Pap

"Our quotes are better!" - Pap

At the Wendy's drivethrough:

"I'm no tomatoes" - Pap

"I'm no lettuce and tomatoe" - Shawn

"I'm no onions" - Seth

"And we're all wacky!!!" - Pap

"I want Dave Thomas supersized..." - Pap

"Oh it's still business hours for Rtsoft, those sell-out bitches!" - Sam

"Did you get Promise off yet?  You need to do that before you go." - Seth's Mother to Shawn

"We've designed our new bathroom to keep fat people out." - Seth

"... they aren't retarted mentally ... just socially I think." - Pap

"I'll have a very comfortable old age ... in bed.  What kinda fortune is that?" - Shawn 
after reading his fortune at a chinese restaurant.

"I think someone is in your house.. unless your cat was trying to beat the door down" - Pap

"Yeah yeah, we've all got harpies." - Seth playing Ultima On-line

"I'm not planning on touching the ceiling in the bathroom." - Seth

"It will be like Cop Rock.. but not bomb!" - Seth

Pap having trouble reinstalling Win95:

"My mom's computer never sucked so much c*ck!" - Pap

"I'm gonna axe every driver on this thing a question!" - Pap

"Sh*tballs!" - Pap

"I'm deleting every f*cking thing, it's gonna rule!" - Pap

"Shotgun.. hah-hah-hah" - Seth (extra smarmy)

"Why is my ice chewy??" - Seth

"Ewww." - Pap

"Did we go to Arby's, someone jizzed in this." - Seth

"I'll do anything with Blue Cheese ..." - Seth

"Ok, find me Peter Eater." - Seth's sister

"Yeah, well if he has a car or whatever, I'll go out with him."
- Seth's sister

"My hair is soft." - Pap

"Yeah, like a brilo pad." - Seth's Sister

"Damn it, if I'd had my Intel Pentium 2 suit, this never would have happened!" - Pap
after spilling butter on his leg.

"Did you like it at all?" - Seth

"No, it tasted funny and I had trouble swallowing it." - Pap

"Oh Sh*t, I just thought of the quotes.txt file!!" - Pap

"If they call on the 1-800 # for LORD sales, you should give them the regular number, " -Pap

"It's no big deal, I can usually can get them off in under a minute," - Seth

"What a great skill to have..." - Pap (smirking)

"Real mature, Smith!" - Seth

"Yeah, do that, but I want it as realistic as Titanic ok?" - Seth

"What does the command 'Bufu' do?" - Seth

"I have a few guesses but probably shouldn't say." - Pap

"Set course for the love boat!!" - Pap as he 'Kal Ort Pors'

"I'm not gonna bend down for that little tiny thing." - Seth

"Good shot B-1" - Seth

"Thanks B-2, did you know that I'm the silent killer?" - Pap

"By the way, good directions!!" - Seth

"Hello, anyone?  Is anyone there.  I've been alone all day, I'm hungry
someone please call.  Anyone ... help me." - Pap delirous on answering
machine

"Maybe his parents caught him in the kitchen ..." - Seth

"If only pigs were electronic, you could pop in a new chip and there
you go." - Seth

"I think I'll destroy them all." - Pap

"Hey, there you go." - Shawn in reply

"Dude, you're gonna ruin the entire group.  Your character doesn't
need it, he can't even f-ing hit slimes!!  Damnit, Damnit, Damnit."
- Pap as Seth gives his character all the good stuff in Might & Magic 6

"Hey what was that one space game called, you know from the people
who made the King Quest games?" - Seth

"You mean Space Quest?" - Pap in response

"Oh ... yes." - Seth

"Are you gonna give it to him?" - Shawn

"If he can afford it, yes.  I explained to him how it works." - Seth

"Yeah, it's going to be like one of those hand held Tiger games, that's our goal.." - Seth

"Great, glad we're moving up," - Pap

"Does Satan work?" - Seth

"Yeah, I fixed him." - Shawn

"Uhh, where is Satan?" - Seth

"Oh, I put him over there." - Shawn

"Yeah, he is pretty tough, being the lord of evil and all." - Seth talking to a customer
on the phone about the end boss in Dink Smallwood

"We believe you should be able to kill people ... and animals." - Seth
speaking to another customer on the phone

"Yeah ... it gets sicker." - Seth

"This is the antithesis of FUN!" - Seth

"It's all about experimenting with the urges." - Seth

"I've got your ASCII version RIGHT HERE!" - Pap yells in frusteration

"My computer does not crash all the time!!" - Seth as he reboots his
computer because it just crashed

"'My adventure come to an end.' is PROPER ENGLISH!" - Pap

"No, no it isn't." - Seth (huge argument follows)

"We should make the slow ass club." - Seth refering to his and Shawn's computers

"Why do the cameras have a monster brain?!" - Pap

"I'm really fu*king glad my computer waited until NOW to go to hell!!!" - Pap as his
computer screws up around the time of finishing the Dink Add-on

"What do you think of this lightning graphic I did?" - Pap

"Hmm.. <pauses> You know what?  We don't really need lightning..." - Seth

"What's WRONG with this?  Why don't you call Bjorn and have him render you
some of that too!" - Pap cries with tears in his eyes

Mystery Island is released. YAY!
